Where's my joy?

For weeks now, there has been one single word that the Lord has placed in my spirit.  It seems that every single day, He throws something at me and brings me to it.

Joy.

I’ve let that word preach to myself, but I feel like He must have intended for me to share my thoughts with you.

Let’s be honest, joy is a struggle.  There are some weeks where I’m full of it.  Others, I have to force myself to smile.  I don’t know about you, but sometimes when I get in a rut of irritability or depression, it’s hard to climb out.  But it’s in those times, I can cuddle up close to Him, spend time in His word, and He pulls me right back up where I belong.

Today, He spoke a phrase into my spirit…. “As Christians, when we lack joy, we lack authenticity.”

Now, before you disagree with that statement, let’s think about it.

Authenticity is a quality to possess.  It simply means to be genuine or real, not false (or fake - ouch).

If there is one thing I want to be known as, it’s an authentic Christian.  I want to be genuine and real.  And I want people to see my authenticity on the outside.  They shouldn’t have to dissect my life or open up my heart to see if Jesus lives there.  They should be able to see Him through the joy I possess.  If I’m full of Him, my outward appearance will reflect it.

As Christians, we all have gifts and talents, and they are all different.  But one thing we all have in common is the joy of the Lord.  When we receive Him, he fills us up with joy.  But while His love, grace, and mercy are never failing and can never be separated from us, joy takes a tad more effort on our part.  We have to choose joy; it can come and go.  We must be proactive, spending time with Him, opening up our hearts and allowing him to fill us up until we are overflowing.  When we overflow joy, others will take note.  And I can’t think of a better way to reach souls, to minister to those who are hurting, than to have joy written all over my face.  No word I say or song I sing will be effective without a joyful heart.

“Always be joyful.  Never stop praying.  Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.”  1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

I’m not saying it’s possible to be joyful 100% of the time.  It’s not always sunshine and rainbows.  And it’s also important to be able to share our struggles with those who need Him.  Some may think we, as Christians, live a stress-free, worry-free life, but that couldn’t be farther from the truth.  However, when we face difficulty, He never leaves our side and He makes a way out.  And we can be joyful in the bad times because we have hope for a better future. 

“The joy of the Lord is my strength.”  Nehemiah 8:10

Life is full of ups and downs, problems, troubles, sickness, unfairness, and cruelty.   Those things tend to weigh heavy on our hearts and they can quickly steal our joy.  It’s also hard to find joy in the mundane walk of life.  I have a hard time finding joy in dirty laundry, misbehaving kids, politics, current events, and piles of bills.  But when I lack joy, I have to remember... if He’s ever brought me out of a sticky situation, blessed me beyond measure, shown me grace when I least deserved it, then I most definitely have something to be joyful about. 

“Satisfy us each morning with your unfailing love, so we may sing for joy to the end of our lives.”  Psalm 90:14

I will never lose the joy-shaped hole in my heart, but it can get empty.  I simply have to fill it up with Him.  When I’ve filled my heart with Him, His joy shines on the outside and it’s uncontrollable.

According to the dictionary, joy comes from being fully satisfied. 

Satisfy me, Lord, so that I can live a joyful life, a testament of Your never-ending love for me.

I’ll leave you with a passage that is so fitting for this topic.  These are words spoken by Jesus, commanding us to be authentic, joy-filled Christians.

            “I am the true grapevine, and my Father is the gardener.  He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more.  You have already been pruned and purified by the message I have given you.  Remain in me, and I will remain in you.  For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me.
Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches.  Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit.  For apart from me you can do nothing.  Anyone who does not remain in me is thrown away like a useless branch and withers.  Such branches are gathered into a pile to be burned.  But if you remain in me and my words remain in you, you may ask for anything you want, and it will be granted.  When you produce much fruit, you are my true disciples.  This brings great glory to my Father. 

I have loved you even as the Father has loved me.  Remain in my love.  When you obey my commandments, you remain in my love, just as I obey my Father’s commandments and remain in his love.  I have told you these things so that you will be filled with my joy.  Yes, your joy will overflow!  This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you.”  John 15:11

interrupted

Consumed.  Bogged down.  Weighted. 

We find ourselves stuck in these situations more often than not.  With our jobs, our neighbors (a.k.a. Facebook), the current and future state of our nation, with life in general.

And then we find ourselves neglecting what’s most important.  Our relationships, our homes, our children, our spiritual commitment.

I started a new devotional book this week called “Real Mom… Real Jesus.”  Reading the very first chapter, I was gut punched.  I urge you to read it, even if it’s just that first chapter.  I can’t speak for the other chapters because I haven’t read them yet, but I can already tell it’s going to be just what I need.

One of my biggest frustrations (and worst character traits) comes from interruptions.  Interruptions in my plans, my schedule, my “that wasn’t supposed to happen that way” life.  The frustration… I bring it upon myself.  I don’t pray enough.  I don’t spend enough time in His word.  I don’t ask for help when I need it.  I try to fix everything.  And I take my frustrations out on my kids.  I find myself crying over spilled milk (literally and metaphorically).  When my kids act like, well, KIDS, I find myself focusing on their dirty handprints on the windows instead of helping them make memories of a carefree childhood.  I want them to remember me as an encourager… not a complainer.

Bitterness has a way of robbing you, and those around you, of His joy.  And don’t think it goes unnoticed by your kids.  They see your heart.  I think God made them that way to keep us on our toes.

With my tasks as a mom, I focus too much on the interruptions.  But in her book, Savage has some great advice.  Instead of focusing on the interruption, focus on the ministry of availability.  Jesus, like us moms, was in high demand.  When He walked the earth, just like us, he felt stretched thin. 

He was interrupted dozens of times a day.  SO AM I!  (Hey, Mommy.... Mommy..... MOMMY!!!)

He was asked a million questions.  YEAH, ME TOO!  (Have you met my oldest child??)

He understands our struggles as a mom.  But he never let a ministry opportunity slip beyond his grasp.  He used life’s interruptions to touch lives.  To uplift spirits.  To heal the broken.  To bring peace to the suffering.

Savage’s prayer, which has now become mine, is as follows:

"Help me, Lord, to see the ministry of availability, what’s right in front of me.  Help me be a blessing to my family, even when it feels like an interruption.  

Help me to reframe what I do every day as a mom – seeing the interruptions as opportunities rather than frustrations.  Grow in me a servant’s heart that ministers to whoever is standing in front of me."

Sometimes we NEED an interruption to keep us on our knees and our eyes on Him.

Sticks and Stones

What seems to be a hot topic these days on social media?  Tearing others down physically and emotionally.  It’s the norm.  Almost every day, I read about someone having to defend themselves against the criticisms of others.

The problem?  We aren’t held accountable for our words.  On the contrary, here’s what the Bible has to say about that.

And he called the people to him and said to them, “Hear and understand: it is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.”  Matthew 15:10-11

We think we can speak whatever is on our minds, whether it’s harmful or helpful to others, and get away with it.  WHY IS THIS?  Do we not think about how our words affect others?  How they affect our testimony?  Our character?  Our relationship with God?  

Our words affect everyone around us, and they affect our own hearts. 

The Bible says “death and life are in the power of the tongue.” 

“So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things.  

How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire!”

Wow.  We don’t realize how much power, life and death, we spew out of our mouths daily.

Seeing how a television news anchor can degrade a woman simply because she’s angry about life and her hurtful words have hardly any consequences, we have become a society who can say anything to anyone and it be acceptable. 

Twitter was bombarded with hateful comments about Pink’s (the performer and MOTHER) body and weight after she posted a picture taken with her daughter, dressed in an evening gown where she looks absolutely stunning.  Yet folks wanna say she’s gained too much weight and is "too fat."  Have you seen that picture???  Google it and tell me if YOU think she's "fat."  I prefer to think she's perfect.  Whose place is it to judge her body image and what’s too skinny or too fat, too pretty or too ugly?  Who has the right to make that judgment???  Not any one of us.

And yet we do it.  We are constantly critical of others and hold nothing back when speaking our thoughts.  And it’s downright dangerous.  Not only are we damaging the spirit of the person at the other end of our judgment, but also we are hardening our own hearts, creating bitterness and ugliness inside of ourselves.  

And we are teaching our children to do the same.

My “Mommy Instincts” want to protect my kids from the hurtful words of others.  However, the only option I have is to teach them to guard their hearts, forgive others, and speak only life into those around them.  And I can teach them to be accountable, because the Lord WILL hold them accountable.

But while they are still young, it’s my responsibility… to show them how to love unconditionally, with no filters for what our society calls “fat” and “ugly.” 

Carrie Underwood’s new song “Little Toy Guns” is so accurate and appropriate for today.  I do wish words were like little toy guns.  No pain.  No hurting anyone.  No smoke.  No bullets.  Just a “bang, bang” rolling off your tongue. 

If only it were that simple.

Words are hurtful.  Choose them wisely, my friends.  You can NEVER, ever, ever take them back.